Spare the Rod? Does the Bible Tell You to Beat Your Child?
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Shiny Happy People is a recently released documentary series on the Duggar family made famous by the television show 19 Kids and Counting. The documentary shows the influence of the Institute in Basic Life Principles that promotes interpretations of the Bible that endorse beating children. The practices the documentary reveals are extreme. Yet many people believe that the Bible instructs parents to spank their children or use other forms of physical punishment when they misbehave.
“Spare the rod, spoil the child,” has become the slogan for advocates of corporal punishment. The verse usually cited is Proverbs 13:24:
Those who spare the rod hate their children,
but those who love them are diligent to discipline them (NRSV).
Is “Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child” a Biblical Saying?
The oft-repeated slogan “Spare the rod, spoil the child” does not come from a biblical source. It is actually a sexual metaphor from a seventeenth century erotic satirical poem by Samuel Butler entitled “Hudibras.” Most people who quote the slogan to advocate for spanking children would blush in embarrassment if they knew what it meant in that poem. They might want to turn instead to an earlier version in an older form of English. This occurs in a 1377 poem known as Piers Plowman: “Who-so spareth ye sprynge [sprig = “rod”], spilleth [spoils] his children."
Regardless of the source, however, the saying has become a stand-in for some verses in Proverbs used to justify corporal punishment of children. The most prominent are Proverbs 13:24, already mentioned, as well as 22:15, 23:13-14, and 29:15.
What Do Words in These Proverbs Verses Mean?
Key words in the selected verses from Proverbs have been interpreted to justify many forms of physical beating of children from an early age.
~ Rod
“Rod” is a translation of the Hebrew shevet. Shevet appears frequently with two basic meanings, “stick” and “tribe.” The “stick” was a multipurpose wooden staff used especially by shepherds. Shepherds used the staff to protect the sheep from wild animals, to guide the sheep, and to count them. The shevet is also mentioned in connection with discipline and education as a means of punishment. The “rod” often serves as a metaphor for all forms of correction. In 2 Samuel 7:14, for example, the consequences King David experiences due to his misdeeds are understood as punishments inflicted by God’s parental rod. The staff also indicates leadership, tribal leadership as well as the monarchical scepter. That may be the origin of the second meaning of the word as the “tribe” led by the one who holds the staff.
~ Beat
The word usually translated “beat” or “strike” is hikkah. In other contexts, the archaic sounding term “smite” is used. Physical beating is assumed.
~ Son or Child
Na’ar, the word for child used in Proverbs 23:13-14, means a young boy, youth, or young adult. A different word is used for infants and young toddlers under five years old. The word in Proverbs 13:24 specifies “son.” The context does not indicate a young child. Not much is said about children who are not male.
~ Discipline
Central to these verses is the cultivation of discipline, musar, also translated as “correction.” The focus of musar is deeper than methods for control of behaviors, however. Musar is a central concept in Jewish ethical discussion. Literature devoted to musar encompasses discussion of virtues and cultivation of character. It points toward holistic development.
We can see, then, that these verses assume some form of physical punishment as an element of guidance. They hardly command parents to beat their children, however, especially not their small children. The emphasis is also on developing discipline, not on punishment. For example, a later Jewish commentary clarifies that using the “rod” does not mean acting in anger or causing injury. Instead “they should lead with gentleness and mercy,” aiming a judicious spank at the legs and not where they can cause injury. (Pele Yoetz 3:1)
Who Wrote Proverbs? Where and When?
According to many critical scholars, the authors of Proverbs were members of the intellectual elites, teachers and bureaucrats associated with the royal court and temple of ancient Israel. These authors are often referred to as the sages. Tradition honors King Solomon by attributing this and other writings to his authorship. Using his name also gave authority to the work. The sages’ sayings may well reflect more widely held folk wisdom as it was shared in common households as well.
In any case, the sages held assumptions about children and about maintaining order in households considered appropriate in their time. They took physical punishment for granted as a necessity to maintain control of subordinates in their households. Children and enslaved people were among those subordinates.
Yet the book of Proverbs does not emphasize household discipline as some later works known as “household codes” do in passages found in the New Testament. Watch for a future post on household codes. Sayings collected in Proverbs instead emphasize growing in wisdom and avoiding foolishness.
Do You Base Your Childrearing Decisions on a Bible Verse?
A prior question is important, however. Why make decisions about childrearing methods based on selected verses from one book in the Bible? Who decided to select these verses? Who decided to interpret them as a biblical command to parents to beat their children? Who decided to prioritize these verses and why?
For example, why not emphasize Proverbs 15:1 as part of a constructive attitude for instilling discipline? It says: “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (NRSV). Why not turn to the example of Jesus receiving the children when his disciples were ready to send them away? (Matthew 19:14; Mark 10:14; Luke 18:16)
Why not consider more recent knowledge about the effects of childrearing practices?
What Does Current Research Show about Corporal Punishment?
A growing body of social science, psychological, and medical research indicates that corporal punishment not only does not improve children’s behavior, but it also negatively affects children’s development for a lifetime. Negative effects can include a lifetime of anxiety disorders, substance abuse and more. Studies that compile many research reports to develop major conclusions consistently show the negative effects of spanking and corporal discipline. A compilation of such “meta-analyses” found “no evidence that spanking is associated with improved child behavior and rather found spanking to be associated with increased risk of 13 detrimental outcomes” (See Gershoff & Grogan-Kaylor, p. 465).
Research about parenting practices that include corporal punishment based on literalist biblical interpretations shows the same outcomes. Children are being harmed for life by these biblical interpretations.
Does Discipline Require Beating?
What if we start with discipline as the focus, not punishment? Addressed to correct negative behaviors, discipline includes guidelines and consequences. This does not require physical punishment. Even those who invoke the necessity of “the rod” do not assume it means physical beatings. For example, the title of an article “Don’t Spare the Rod” implies that it will advocate corporal punishment. It’s author, frustrated teacher Daniel Buck, instead offers examples of the damaging effects of his school administrators failing to follow up serious bullying with any consequences. As in many other instances, “the rod” indicates consequences, not a literal beating with a stick.
Childrearing practices are very much a matter for discussion, intercultural learning, and ongoing evaluation. Many families raise their children without hitting them, however. Many such families also participate in faith communities that value biblical teachings. By “sparing the rod,” they are not in opposition to the Bible. They are loving their children.
Does the Bible Tell You to Beat Your Child?
We need to recall, first, that the Bible does not speak with one voice. The Bible as a whole does not issue such commands. The verses often cited from Proverbs refer to the use of the “rod” as a means of correction and discipline for children. These verses share a widespread assumption in ancient cultures of the regions that influenced the sages. They assumed that discipline included corporal measures. This is why we have not answered No.
The emphasis in Proverbs is on discipline and guidance, however, not the use of beating. The verses also do not assume young children but mostly adolescents and young adults. Advocates of corporal punishment have selected and interpreted a few verses from Proverbs with a misplaced emphasis on the rod as an instrument for beating children. This is an instance of the Bible being weaponized, in this case against children.
Current research shows the negative results of corporal punishment. Advocates of childrearing practices that guide children without the use of physical punishment recognize that a few selectively interpreted verses from Proverbs do not constitute a command that applies to modern parents. Wisdom can be found in biblical teachings, including Proverbs, without using selected verses to justify practices many find abhorrent, and that studies show are damaging.
Additional Resources and Sources Mentioned:
Buck, Daniel. “Don’t Spare the Rod.” First Things June/July 334 (2023): 13–14.
Camp, Claudia, and Carole R. Fontaine. “Proverbs.” In The HarperCollins Study Bible: New Revised Standard Version, Including the Apocryphal Deuterocanonical Books with Concordance, edited by Harold W. Attridge and Wayne A. Meeks, 849–51. First ed. San Francisco: HarperSanFrancisco, 2006.
Claussen, Geoffrey D. Modern Musar: Contested Virtues in Jewish Thought. JPS Anthologies of Jewish Thought. Philadelphia: Jewish Publication Society; Lincoln, 2022.
Dell, Katharine J. The Book of Proverbs in Social and Theological Context. Cambridge, UK: Cambridge University Press, 2009.
Fink, Daniel. “Spare the Rod: The Nature and Role of Discipline in the Jewish Family.” Sefaria.org, 1 March 2020. (A perspective from a rabbi with additional Jewish commentaries.)
Gershoff, Elizabeth T., and Andrew Grogan-Kaylor. “Spanking and Child Outcomes: Old Controversies and New Meta-Analyses.” Journal of Family Psychology 30.4 (2016): 453–69.
Ogden Bellis, Alice. “Proverbs in Recent Research.” Currents in Biblical Research 20.2 (2022): 133–64.
